Priya: my brother -- he’s got a big crush on Bernadette.
我的哥哥深深地暗恋着伯纳黛特
Leonard: you’re moving back to India?
你要回印度吗
Leonard: what’s going on?
这是怎么回事
Penny: it’s – it’s not what it looks like.
反正不是你们看上去的那样
Sheldon: what does it looks like?
到底看上去像怎么样
Sheldon: it’s not what it looks like. It’s not what it looks like. 不是你们看上去的那样。不是你们看上去的那样
Leonard: what are you grinding about？
你在碎碎念什么啊
Penny’s brain teaser this morning. She and koothrappali emerge from your bedroom. She is disheveled and raj is dressed only in a sheet. The sale clue: it’s not what looks is like.
佩妮今早留下的头脑风暴悬念，她跟库帕斯里从你的卧室走出，衣衫不整，拉杰只裹了个床单，唯一的线索只有“不是你们看上去的那样”
Leonard: just let it go. Sheldon.
别纠结了，谢尔顿
Sheldon:if I could.i would.but I can’t.so I shan’t.now,kowning penny,the obvious answers is,they engaged in,but„since,that’s what it looked like.we can rule that out. Let’s put out thingking cap,shall we? Raj is from india, a tropical country. third world hygiene. parasitic infections are common. such as pinworms. the procedure for diagnosing pinworms is to wait until the subject is asleep. and the worms crawl out of the rectum for air.yes,just like that.penny could have inspecting raj’s and region for parasitcs.oh,boy,that’s a ture blue friend.
纠结不是我想停就能停的。目前的信息表明，佩妮，最明显的答案当然是两人交媾了，但是，鉴于那是“看上去的那样”，我们可以排除这个可能性。让我们戴上智能帽子考虑一下吧，如何？拉杰来自印度，一个热带国家，第三世界的卫生条件，寄生病感染司空见惯，例如蛲虫病。诊断蛲虫病的步骤就是等待。直到宿主陷入沉睡状态。然后蛲虫从宿主的直肠爬出来透气。没错，就像你刚才那样。佩妮可能在观测寄生虫从拉杰的菊花爬出来呢！真是位称职的蓝颜知己啊！ Leonard:they slept together ,Sherlock.
他们上床了，大神探！
Sheldon:no,you weren’t listening,she said it’s not what it looks like. 不，你没认真听。她说了“不是你们看上去的那样”
Leonard:she lied.
她撒谎了
Sheldon:oh,don’t I look silly sitting wearing this!
呃。那我坐在这还戴着这东西岂不是弱爆了
Sheldon:Leonard,is it awkward for you，knowing that one of your dear friends had sexual，intercourse with a woman you used to love in the very place you lay your head.
莱纳德，现在对你而言，看到你的挚友跟你曾经爱过的女人就在你每天睡觉的地方交媾是否觉得很尴尬？
Leonard:no,I’m fine with it.
不，我能接受
Sheldon:that’s sounds like sarcasm,but I’m going to disregard it.because I have an agenda—paintball.specfically,the interdepartmental tournament this weekend.in order to function better as a fighting unit,I thought we should establish a chain of commana.now,it goes without saying,that I would outrank the three of you,but the question remains,by how much?now,I don’t see me as a some four-star general,back at HQ riding a desk,and playing golf with the Secretary Of Defense.but I also can’t be sergeant cooper,because that might lead you to think of me as just a regular Joe.this might take some thoughts,as you were.
那听起来像讽刺啊，但是我绝对无视他。因为我还有其他安排：玩彩弹枪。本周来点特别的，搞个不同部门间的比赛。为了成为更有效率的作战小队，我认为我们有必要建立一个领导机制，当然自不待言，我的地位理应高于你们三位。但问题高多少呢？我认为我不该充当那种在指挥部桌前发号施令，只会跟国防部打高尔夫的四星将的角色。但我也不能当库珀中士，这可能会误导你们把我看成小人物，这事可能需要动点脑筋，交给你们了。
Leonard:what the hell is wrong with you?
你到底有什么毛病啊
Howard:yeah,how could you do that?
是啊，你怎么能这么做呢
Raj:what is it to you?
跟你有什么关系
Howard:I got this back.
我挺他啊
Raj:yeah,right„you’re just jealous because it turns out I’m penny’s number two choice after Leonard.
嗯，是吗？你应该是嫉妒。我因为事实证明我才是佩妮仅次于莱纳德的第二选择 Howard:hey,if I wasn’t engaged to Bernadette that totally could have been me.
拜托，如果我没跟伯纳黛特订婚，二号选择完全可能是我
Leonard:please,Sheldon would have been before you ,and he might not even have genitals.
拜托，谢尔顿都有可能在你之前，他说不定连生殖器都没有呢
Raj:why do you care so much? You’re dating my sister and penny and I are in love.
你为何这么关心我啊啊？你还跟我妹妹约会啊，况且佩妮和我相恋了 Howard&Leonard:what?
什么
Sheldon:gentlemen.if I may interject,I’ve decided my rank will be captain,it’s good enough for me.
先生们，容我插一句，我决定我的军阶为上尉了。如果科克船长、嘎嘣脆船长和袋鼠船长都能胜任此职，那对我而言也不错
Howard:you’re not in love with penny.
你有没有跟佩妮相恋
Raj:yes,I am.the god kamadeva has shot us with his flowery arrows of love. 有，我有，伟大的天神加摩天用他的爱之花箭射中了我们
Howard:who?
谁？
Raj:he’s the hindu verson of cupid.but may better because he rides a giant parrot.
他是印度的丘比特。但他帅多了，因为他骑着一只硕大的鹦鹉
Leonard:raj,come on,you fall in love with any girl who smiles ay you.a mouth ago,you were writing poems about his fiance.
拜托，拉杰，哪个女孩子对你笑你就会爱上谁。一个月前你还给他未婚妻写情诗呢
Howard:I am sorry,what?
什么？他啥意思啊
Raj:rubbish,the’s talking rubbish.
胡说，他胡说八道
Leonard:oh,Bernadette,please play my clarinet.
哦，伯纳黛特，请给我吹箫吧
Raj:that could have been about anyone.besides,you have nothing to worry about ,because now I’m the dusky half of koothrapenny.
那也可以是别人吗。况且你没必要担心，我现在是库佩恋的主角之一
Sheldon:for the record,I do have genitals.they’re functional and aesthetionally pleasing.
说明一下，我有生殖器，不但功能强劲，而且外形健美
Penny:oh,coming.yup,that’s good wine glasses should have handles. 少来吧你。说到底还是一醉解千愁。
Amy:keeping accurate track of your alcohol intake.smart idea considering how trampy you get when you’re had a few.
准确记录你得酒精摄入量。鉴于你的酒后乱性程度，这么做很聪明
Penny:you heard what I do?
你听说我干的事啦
Amy:well,I heard who you did.
我听说你做了谁了
Penny:oh,my god,I screwed up everything.i hurt Leonard,I hurt raj.i mean,what is wrong with me?i feel like two totally different people—Dr.jekyll and Mrs.whore.
老天那。我全搞砸了。我伤害了莱纳德，伤害了拉杰，我真是有毛病啊我，我感觉自己完全是两个不同的人，华娼博士
Amy:Don’t be so hard on yourself.do you know the story of Catherine the great?
别太自责了，你知道凯萨琳大帝的故事吗？
Penny:no.
不知道
Amy:she ruled Russia in the late 1700s.and one night,when she was feeling particularly randy.she used an intricate system of pulleys to have intimate relations with a horse.
她是俄罗斯18世纪后期的统治者。一天晚上，她感觉性欲特别强，她用一个复杂的轮滑系统跟一匹马发生了亲密关系
Penny:I’m sorry,what does this have to do with me?
咦？这跟我有什么关系？
Amy:she engaged in interspecies hanky-panky,and penple still call he “great”,I’m sure your reputation can survive,you shagging a little Indian boy.
她跟不同物种发生过关系，但人们依然尊称她为“大帝”啊！我相信你的名誉不会因为一个小印度男而毁掉的
Bernadette:you jerk face!what did you tell howard?!did you say there was something going on between us?because he thinks there is!he’s completely freaking out!
你个不要脸的东西，你跟霍华德说什么了。你跟他说我们之间有奸情是不是？他现在就是这么想的，他整个人都抓狂了
Raj:please,come in.
请进
Bernadette : at the hell is wrong with you ?!
你这人有毛病啊
Raj:well„you were always so nice to me,I thought maybe you liked me . 你总是对我这么好，我以为你喜欢我吗。
Bernadette:I’m nice to everyone!
我对谁都这么好啊
Raj:I’m sorry.
对不起
Bernadette:damn sorry.you’re sorry.and you tell howard there’s never been anything between us!
没错，你是对不起我，你去跟霍华德说我们之间没有任何暧昧之情
Raj:I will,hey , Bernadette.
我会的，但伯纳黛特
Bernadette:what?
怎么了？
Raj:do you think I shot with penny ?
你觉得我和佩妮有机会吗
Bernadette:of course you do.you’re a cute pie!any girl would be lucky to have you .
当然啦，你那么可爱，哪个女孩子遇到你真是三生有幸啊
Penny:you know,I’ve done this before in kindergarten.i was supposed to marry Jason Sorensen at recess,but by the time my class got out there,he was already engaged to Chelsea himmelfarb.so what did I do? the monkey bars, let all the boys see my underpants.
你知道吗？我以前就犯过这种错，在幼儿园的时候，我本来要在下课期间嫁给杰森·索伦森，但等同学们都出来的时候，他已经和切尔西·辛莫法订婚了。知道我怎么做吗？我倒挂在猴架上，让全部男生看我内裤。
Amy:you can’t blame yourself when your prefrontal cortex fails to make you happy.promiscuity rewards you with the needed flood of dopamine-we neurobiologists refer to this as the “skank reflex”.
你不能责怪自己，当你的前额皮质无法使你开心时滥交能给你带来大量所需的多巴胺。我们神经生物学家称之为“下流反射”
Penny:you know what?let’s get out of here.
这样吧，我们出去玩
Amy:where are we going?
我们去哪玩
Penny:somewhere where no one’s seen me naked.we may have to drive a while. 去没有人看过我裸体的地方，可能得开一会车才行
Sheldon:subtlety isn’t her strong suit,is it?
聪敏就不是她的强项对吧
Penny:can I stay at your place for a few nights?
我能去你家睡几晚吗
Amy:really? A best friend sleepover? Yay.
真的吗？闺蜜来过夜，好耶
Penny:yeah,sure,yay!
当然，好耶
Amy:we’ll make popcorn,stay up all night,and I’ll teach you my secret language.op.
我们弄点爆米花，玩他个通宵。我会教你说我的密语，表嗷话
Penny:sounds great.
听上去不错
Amy:nope,sounds “gtop rop e a top”.
错，应该是听上去“表嗷错哦”
Penny:yeah,t’m gonna go back a bag.
好耶，我去收个包
Amy:no, you’re not,you’re gonno “pop a cop kop a bop a gop”. 不，错了，你是去“收个表嗷哦”
Leonard:do we really have to wear the camouflage crap to play paintball? 我们真要穿这蠢爆了的迷彩服去打彩弹吗
Sheldon:who said that?leonard,I can heard your voice,but I can’t see you. 谁在说话？莱纳德，我能听到你但看不到你
Leonard:I’m not in the mood, Sheldon.
我没那心情，谢尔顿
Sheldon:oh,there you are!leonard,I know you’re upset about recent events
and I have someone here to help.
哎呀，你在这啊。莱纳德，我知道你为最近的事不开心，所以我找了人来帮你 Leonard:I don’t want to talk to amy.
我不想和艾米说话
Sheldon:no,it’s not amy.
不，那不是艾米
L’mum:hello,dear.
你好，宝贝
Leonard:you called my mother.
你叫了我妈
Sheldon:oh,Leonard,is it nexessary to caption the obvious?
莱纳德，非要说的这么明显吗
L’mum:he’s been like that since he was a toddler.look,mommy—a butterfly,maddening.
他还是小孩时就这样了。看啊，妈咪，一只蝴蝶，真闹心
Leonard:what’s going on?what do you want.
怎么了，你有什么事
L’mum:Sheldon informed me that you’re experiencing an emotional uphearal and I’m here to help.
谢尔顿告诉我说 你正在遭遇感情上的剧变，所以我来帮忙
Leonard:that’s so nice.
你真贴心
L’mum:and we’ve back to the obvious.now,what’s up?
这不又是明摆着的么。好吧，怎么了
Leonard:well„uh.okay.i don’t want to get back together with penny,we tried it,it was crazy,it didn’t work.but I can’t deal with the fact that she slept with my friend raj,and the I find out the raj’sister priya who I’ve been going out with eight mouths is wrong back ti Indian.so I’mjust completely confused and alone.
那个 额„我不想和佩妮复合，我们尝试过，很疯狂，效果很糟糕，但我也不能接受她和我朋友拉杰上床了，我还发现拉杰的妹妹普里亚，我和她交往了八个月，而她现在要回印度，所以我完全迷茫和寂寞了。
L’mum:I understand.
我理解
Leonard:got any advice?
有什么建议吗
L’mum:yes,buck up!
当然有啦，振作起来
Leonard:excuse me,you’re a world-renowned expert in parenting and child development and all you’re got is “buck up”?
啥？你是一个世界知名的育儿和儿童成长专家，能给的建议就是“振作起来”吗？ L’mum:sorry,buck up,sissy pants.
不好意思，振作起来，小娘跑
Leonard:thanks,mother,I feel much better.
多谢，妈妈，我感觉好多了
L’mum:if you need any more help from me.my books are available on amazon.logging off!
如果你需要我的更多帮助，就去亚马逊上买我的书。下了
Amy: ninety-nine,one hundred.it’s like a waterfall of liquid gold,my turn.
99,100，秀发如瀑布一般倾泻而下。轮到我了。
Penny:you know,I don’t even know what the point of me satying in L.A. I haven’t gotten a single acting job since I moved out here.the close I came was last mouth I got a callback for a hemorrhoid commercial. 我都不知道我干嘛要住在洛杉矶，自我搬到这后连一次演员工作机会都没有。最接近的就是上个月，一个做痔疮广告的打了电话给我
Amy:oh,I could so see you being the face of hemorrhoids.
我能感觉你那张脸演得了痔疮的会很传神
Penny:I know,right?maybe I should just move back to Nebraska. 你也觉得吧，我是不是干脆搬回内布拉斯加得了
Amy:no,I can’t let you do that.
不，你不能这么做
Penny；why not?
为什么
Amy:for the first time ever,I habe a thriving social life,and no pressure ,but it kind of lives and dies with you.
有史以来第一次我的社会生活蒸蒸日上，不是给你压力，但你要是走了，这一切都完了
Raj:hi,amy,can I talk to penny?
你好，艾米，我能和佩妮谈谈吗
Amy:a guest in my trunale bed and a boy at my door? I wish I could tell 13-year-old me “it does get better”.
我的滚轮床有人来睡，还有男生来我家。我真想穿越回去告诉十三岁的我“真的会好起来的”
Penny:how did you know I was here ?
你怎么知道我在这里
Raj:it’s all over her facebook page.
她的facebook都写了
Amy:I’ll take your stuff to the bedroom,and clear out a dramer. 我把你的东西搬进卧室，再把抽屉整理一下
Penny:thanks.
谢啦
Amy:no problem,try and keep it in your pants,okay?
没事，这次管好你的裤子，好吗？
Penny:so,hi,what’s up?
你好，有事吗
Raj:I was wondering if you’re free Friday.they’reholding a totally 80s night at the greek.hall&oates,Katrina and the waves,and three-fifths of
kajagoogoo.
不知道你周五有没有空？周五在格里克有个八十年代之夜，有霍尔与奥兹二重唱，卡特琳娜还有卡家狗狗组合里的三个人
Penny:gee,that’s really sweet,but the thing is?
这真的很不错，但问题是„
Raj:aw,there’s a thing.
有问题了
Penny:look,honey,I was really drunk and made a huge mistake last night.we should’ve never slept together.it’s what ruins friendships.
听我解释，亲爱的，昨晚我醉得很厉害才犯了一个很严重的错误，我们绝不该发生这种关系，这会毁了我们的友谊的
Raj:you can’t ruin a friendship with sex.that’s like trying to ruin ice cream with chocolate sprinkles.
做爱是毁不了友谊的。就好像巧克力屑不会毁了冰淇淋一样
Penny:come here,just listen to me. I want to go back to the way we were before,you know,friend,no sprinkles.
来，坐下来，听我说。我想时光倒流，回到我们从前那样，当朋友，不放巧克力屑
Raj:all right.
好吧
Penny:thank you.
谢谢
Raj:as your friend,you might like to know that,um„we didn’t have sex in the conwentional sense.
作为朋友，我要告诉你，传统意义上来说，我们没有做爱
Penny:oh,god,did you pull some weird Indian crap on me?
天啊，你对我做了什么怪异的印度花样吗
Raj:no,no,after we got undressed and jumped in bed you-you asked if I had protection.
不 不是的，我们脱光衣服上床之后，你问了我有没有带安全套
Penny:oh,you did,didn’t you?
哦，你一定带了是吧
Raj:of course,I’m always packing anyway.um.i had trouble putting it on ,and you tried to help and that was all she wrote.
当然，我一向随身带着的。总之，当时我有点带不上套子你就想来帮我，然后，就没有然后了
Penny:so,we didn’t actually.
所以，我们其实没有
Raj:I did,it was beautiful.penny,please,please,promise me you won’t tell anybody about this.
我射了，感觉很美妙。佩妮，求求你答应我不会告诉任何人
Penny:of course.i won’t,no,I won’t.
当然 一定不说
Raj:oh,good,um„can t tell people that our love burned too bright and too
quickly?kind of a “candle in the wind”deal?
太好了，我可不可以告诉别人。我们的爱燃烧太快，转瞬即逝，就像“风中之烛”那样
Penny:sure.
当然可以
Raj:cool,can I say it fell apart because you were all “I want to have babies” and I was like I am too rock and roll to be tied down？
酷，我可以说我们分手，是因为你一直嚷嚷着想要孩子，而我觉得自己还要继续流浪不能安定下来吗？
Penny:no.
不行
Raj:can I stay I ruined you for white men?
我可以说因为你是白种人，所以甩了我吗
Penny:also no.
还是不行
Raj:okay,just the candle thing.
好吧 就说风中烛那个吧
Penny:yeah.
对
Raj:cool,all right,friend I see you allowed.
酷 好吧 如果你允许我会来看你的
Penny:okay.
好的
Raj:wait,thank you for being my friend.penny,it’s getting beautiful again.
等等。谢谢你把我当朋友， 拉杰：佩妮，我又开始觉得美妙了
Sheldon:all right,this is a google earth view of the field of battle. 好了，这是本战场的“谷歌地球”画面
Howard:I don’t see anything.
我什么都没看见
Sheldon:give it a second to load,whenever you’re ready AT&T.okay,here we go.this is us here to the south is professor Loomis and the gedogy department.according to there twitter feed.they’ve out of sunblock which means they’ll have to hug the tree line or risk melanoma.that’s our edge.all we to do is more quickly ever the ridge,the rock-worshipping post-faced bastard won’t know what hit them!all right,let’s move out. 等一会，在载入。可以了吧，AT&T（美国电话电报公司），好了，来吧。我们在这，南面是卢米斯教授和地质系诸人。据其twitter记录，他们没防晒霜了，就是说他们要不躲在林木线下，不然就有得黑色素瘤危险。这就是我们的优势。我们只要快速穿过这个山脊，就能把这帮崇拜石头苍白脸色的混蛋出其不意的击倒。好了，出发吧
Leonard:hang on,Sheldon,how could you not tell me your sister was moving back to india?
等等，谢尔顿，你怎么能不告诉我你妹妹要回印度？
Howard:maybe he was too busy,writing clumsy penis metaphors about my fiancé.
也许他当时正忙着写关于我未婚妻的拙劣阴茎隐喻
Raj:screw you.that was a beautifully written penis metaphors. 滚你的，那明明是绝妙的阴茎隐喻
Leonard:you know what,guys,I’m not in the mood fot paintball what do you say we just bag it?
各位，我实在没心情打彩弹球，不如我们直接当逃兵吧
Howard:fine,with me
我同意
Raj:sure,whatever.
好吧 随便
Sheldon:you can’t quit. That’s a court-martial offense.that’s punishment by„ you can’t quit.
不能当逃兵，这样是要交军事法庭审判的罪行，可被判处 反正不行
Leonard:sorry,Sheldon,it’s just hot a good time for playing games. 抱歉 谢尔顿，现在玩彩弹球游戏实在不是时候
Sheldon:this is a game to you？
你以为这是游戏吗
Leonard:yes.
是
Sheldon:wait,I just want you all to know that I fogive you.this mutiny isn’t your fault,it’s mine.i haven’t earned these bars.although what I lack in leadship apparently I more than make up for in security. 慢着，我只是想你们知道，我原谅你们了。这次叛变不是你们的错，是我的问题，我配不上这些两道杠（军衔）。显然我的领导才能的不足全弥补在缝纫技术上了
Howard:let it go,Sheldon.i’ll get you a jamba juice on the way home. 算了吧 谢尔顿，回家的路上我会给你买杯丈八的果汁的
Sheldon:no, jamba juice is for heroes.and that’s what we ‘ve going to be.
不要，丈八果汁是给英雄喝得。所以我们要当英雄
Leonard:what are you dong?
你要干嘛
Sheldon:following in the footsteps of kirk,crunch and kangaroo.gedogy isn’t a real science.
步科克船长和嘎嘣脆船长以及袋鼠船长的后尘。地质学不是真正的科学 Howard:damn those son of bitches! Let’s get em. Eat paint.
那帮混球太过分了 干掉他们 尝尝老子的厉害
Sheldon:if there’s ever a church of Sheldon,this will be when it started,ow!
如果将来有谢尔顿党的话，那应该就是从此刻成立的 哎呦喂
Leonard:I’d like to propose a toast to the man whose noble sacrifice inspired our vitory.captain Sheldon cooper.
让我们为英雄举杯，正是他悲壮的牺牲，我们才能赢得胜利。感谢谢尔顿·库帕
上尉
Sheldon:excuse me,it’s major Sheldon cooper,with my last breath,I awarded
myself a battlefield promotion,it’s kind of a big deal.
抱歉，应该是谢尔顿·库帕少校。为了犒赏在沙场上的英勇，我用残存的一口气
给自己升了一级官，这也算小有成就吧
Penny:hi,you guys have a minute?
嗨 你们有时间吗
Leonard:uh,yeah,sure.
当然有
Penny:ok ,well,I already talked to raj but I wanted to apologize to the
vest of you for. You know everything.
好的，我已经跟拉杰谈过了，但是我想向你们其他几个道歉，为之前的一切做个
解释
Raj:please,penny,let me,we’ve decide to let our crazy,wonderful night
together be just one of those memories you have.and can call to mind when
you’re feeling blue or you’re in the shower.
拜托 佩妮，让我来说吧，我们决定让那晚既疯狂又美好的春宵成为大家心里最
美好的回忆。当你们心情低落或洗澡时可以拿出来回味一下
Penny:hey,what you doing,quick draw?
你这是干什么 三分钟先生
Raj:sorry,go on.
抱歉 你请说
Penny；anyways,I wanted you guys all to know that I’ve been talking a
really hard look at things.and come to the conclusion I have to stop
kidding myself.i suck at acting.it’s time for me to more back to Nebraska.
总之，我来是想告诉大家，我很认真的审视了一遍自己，于是得出一个结论，我
不能在自欺欺人了，我根本不会演戏，是时候卷铺盖回家了
Leonard:you’re leaving?
你要走吗
Penny:yeah.
对
Howard:what are you going to do in Nebraska?
你准备回内布拉斯加做什么
Penny:I don’t know,maybe teach acting,sorry hold on.
不知道 或许教表演吧。抱歉 稍等
Leonard:penny,listen,I hope you’re not doing this cause of you and
me,because I have a girlfriend and you’re a single woman.
佩妮，听着，我不希望你是因为我才走的。因为我有女友相伴，而你只能孤芳自
赏
Penny:shh!it’s my agent. it’s my agent.you’re kidding me.oh,my gosh.i
can’t believe it ,really?oh,I’m so excited.thank you. Thank you very
much.ok.bye.i got the hemorrhoid commercial!i start Monday.
别吵，我经纪人打来的，你开什么玩笑。天啊，我简直不敢相信，真的吗？我太
激动了，谢谢 非常感谢。好 再见。我接了个痔疮广告，周一开拍
Sheldon:what about Nebraska?
那内布拉斯加呢
Penny:oh,hell with Nebraska.i’m gonna be a star.
鬼才回内布拉斯加呢。姐要当明星了
Sheldon:have you ever though of teaching physics?
你有考虑过教物理吗？
班级: 商务英语1班
饶烺
Priya: my brother -- he’s got a big crush on Bernadette.
我的哥哥深深地暗恋着伯纳黛特
Leonard: you’re moving back to India?
你要回印度吗
Leonard: what’s going on?
这是怎么回事
Penny: it’s – it’s not what it looks like.
反正不是你们看上去的那样
Sheldon: what does it looks like?
到底看上去像怎么样
Sheldon: it’s not what it looks like. It’s not what it looks like. 不是你们看上去的那样。不是你们看上去的那样
Leonard: what are you grinding about？
你在碎碎念什么啊
Penny’s brain teaser this morning. She and koothrappali emerge from your bedroom. She is disheveled and raj is dressed only in a sheet. The sale clue: it’s not what looks is like.
佩妮今早留下的头脑风暴悬念，她跟库帕斯里从你的卧室走出，衣衫不整，拉杰只裹了个床单，唯一的线索只有“不是你们看上去的那样”
Leonard: just let it go. Sheldon.
别纠结了，谢尔顿
Sheldon:if I could.i would.but I can’t.so I shan’t.now,kowning penny,the obvious answers is,they engaged in,but„since,that’s what it looked like.we can rule that out. Let’s put out thingking cap,shall we? Raj is from india, a tropical country. third world hygiene. parasitic infections are common. such as pinworms. the procedure for diagnosing pinworms is to wait until the subject is asleep. and the worms crawl out of the rectum for air.yes,just like that.penny could have inspecting raj’s and region for parasitcs.oh,boy,that’s a ture blue friend.
纠结不是我想停就能停的。目前的信息表明，佩妮，最明显的答案当然是两人交媾了，但是，鉴于那是“看上去的那样”，我们可以排除这个可能性。让我们戴上智能帽子考虑一下吧，如何？拉杰来自印度，一个热带国家，第三世界的卫生条件，寄生病感染司空见惯，例如蛲虫病。诊断蛲虫病的步骤就是等待。直到宿主陷入沉睡状态。然后蛲虫从宿主的直肠爬出来透气。没错，就像你刚才那样。佩妮可能在观测寄生虫从拉杰的菊花爬出来呢！真是位称职的蓝颜知己啊！ Leonard:they slept together ,Sherlock.
他们上床了，大神探！
Sheldon:no,you weren’t listening,she said it’s not what it looks like. 不，你没认真听。她说了“不是你们看上去的那样”
Leonard:she lied.
她撒谎了
Sheldon:oh,don’t I look silly sitting wearing this!
呃。那我坐在这还戴着这东西岂不是弱爆了
Sheldon:Leonard,is it awkward for you，knowing that one of your dear friends had sexual，intercourse with a woman you used to love in the very place you lay your head.
莱纳德，现在对你而言，看到你的挚友跟你曾经爱过的女人就在你每天睡觉的地方交媾是否觉得很尴尬？
Leonard:no,I’m fine with it.
不，我能接受
Sheldon:that’s sounds like sarcasm,but I’m going to disregard it.because I have an agenda—paintball.specfically,the interdepartmental tournament this weekend.in order to function better as a fighting unit,I thought we should establish a chain of commana.now,it goes without saying,that I would outrank the three of you,but the question remains,by how much?now,I don’t see me as a some four-star general,back at HQ riding a desk,and playing golf with the Secretary Of Defense.but I also can’t be sergeant cooper,because that might lead you to think of me as just a regular Joe.this might take some thoughts,as you were.
那听起来像讽刺啊，但是我绝对无视他。因为我还有其他安排：玩彩弹枪。本周来点特别的，搞个不同部门间的比赛。为了成为更有效率的作战小队，我认为我们有必要建立一个领导机制，当然自不待言，我的地位理应高于你们三位。但问题高多少呢？我认为我不该充当那种在指挥部桌前发号施令，只会跟国防部打高尔夫的四星将的角色。但我也不能当库珀中士，这可能会误导你们把我看成小人物，这事可能需要动点脑筋，交给你们了。
Leonard:what the hell is wrong with you?
你到底有什么毛病啊
Howard:yeah,how could you do that?
是啊，你怎么能这么做呢
Raj:what is it to you?
跟你有什么关系
Howard:I got this back.
我挺他啊
Raj:yeah,right„you’re just jealous because it turns out I’m penny’s number two choice after Leonard.
嗯，是吗？你应该是嫉妒。我因为事实证明我才是佩妮仅次于莱纳德的第二选择 Howard:hey,if I wasn’t engaged to Bernadette that totally could have been me.
拜托，如果我没跟伯纳黛特订婚，二号选择完全可能是我
Leonard:please,Sheldon would have been before you ,and he might not even have genitals.
拜托，谢尔顿都有可能在你之前，他说不定连生殖器都没有呢
Raj:why do you care so much? You’re dating my sister and penny and I are in love.
你为何这么关心我啊啊？你还跟我妹妹约会啊，况且佩妮和我相恋了 Howard&Leonard:what?
什么
Sheldon:gentlemen.if I may interject,I’ve decided my rank will be captain,it’s good enough for me.
先生们，容我插一句，我决定我的军阶为上尉了。如果科克船长、嘎嘣脆船长和袋鼠船长都能胜任此职，那对我而言也不错
Howard:you’re not in love with penny.
你有没有跟佩妮相恋
Raj:yes,I am.the god kamadeva has shot us with his flowery arrows of love. 有，我有，伟大的天神加摩天用他的爱之花箭射中了我们
Howard:who?
谁？
Raj:he’s the hindu verson of cupid.but may better because he rides a giant parrot.
他是印度的丘比特。但他帅多了，因为他骑着一只硕大的鹦鹉
Leonard:raj,come on,you fall in love with any girl who smiles ay you.a mouth ago,you were writing poems about his fiance.
拜托，拉杰，哪个女孩子对你笑你就会爱上谁。一个月前你还给他未婚妻写情诗呢
Howard:I am sorry,what?
什么？他啥意思啊
Raj:rubbish,the’s talking rubbish.
胡说，他胡说八道
Leonard:oh,Bernadette,please play my clarinet.
哦，伯纳黛特，请给我吹箫吧
Raj:that could have been about anyone.besides,you have nothing to worry about ,because now I’m the dusky half of koothrapenny.
那也可以是别人吗。况且你没必要担心，我现在是库佩恋的主角之一
Sheldon:for the record,I do have genitals.they’re functional and aesthetionally pleasing.
说明一下，我有生殖器，不但功能强劲，而且外形健美
Penny:oh,coming.yup,that’s good wine glasses should have handles. 少来吧你。说到底还是一醉解千愁。
Amy:keeping accurate track of your alcohol intake.smart idea considering how trampy you get when you’re had a few.
准确记录你得酒精摄入量。鉴于你的酒后乱性程度，这么做很聪明
Penny:you heard what I do?
你听说我干的事啦
Amy:well,I heard who you did.
我听说你做了谁了
Penny:oh,my god,I screwed up everything.i hurt Leonard,I hurt raj.i mean,what is wrong with me?i feel like two totally different people—Dr.jekyll and Mrs.whore.
老天那。我全搞砸了。我伤害了莱纳德，伤害了拉杰，我真是有毛病啊我，我感觉自己完全是两个不同的人，华娼博士
Amy:Don’t be so hard on yourself.do you know the story of Catherine the great?
别太自责了，你知道凯萨琳大帝的故事吗？
Penny:no.
不知道
Amy:she ruled Russia in the late 1700s.and one night,when she was feeling particularly randy.she used an intricate system of pulleys to have intimate relations with a horse.
她是俄罗斯18世纪后期的统治者。一天晚上，她感觉性欲特别强，她用一个复杂的轮滑系统跟一匹马发生了亲密关系
Penny:I’m sorry,what does this have to do with me?
咦？这跟我有什么关系？
Amy:she engaged in interspecies hanky-panky,and penple still call he “great”,I’m sure your reputation can survive,you shagging a little Indian boy.
她跟不同物种发生过关系，但人们依然尊称她为“大帝”啊！我相信你的名誉不会因为一个小印度男而毁掉的
Bernadette:you jerk face!what did you tell howard?!did you say there was something going on between us?because he thinks there is!he’s completely freaking out!
你个不要脸的东西，你跟霍华德说什么了。你跟他说我们之间有奸情是不是？他现在就是这么想的，他整个人都抓狂了
Raj:please,come in.
请进
Bernadette : at the hell is wrong with you ?!
你这人有毛病啊
Raj:well„you were always so nice to me,I thought maybe you liked me . 你总是对我这么好，我以为你喜欢我吗。
Bernadette:I’m nice to everyone!
我对谁都这么好啊
Raj:I’m sorry.
对不起
Bernadette:damn sorry.you’re sorry.and you tell howard there’s never been anything between us!
没错，你是对不起我，你去跟霍华德说我们之间没有任何暧昧之情
Raj:I will,hey , Bernadette.
我会的，但伯纳黛特
Bernadette:what?
怎么了？
Raj:do you think I shot with penny ?
你觉得我和佩妮有机会吗
Bernadette:of course you do.you’re a cute pie!any girl would be lucky to have you .
当然啦，你那么可爱，哪个女孩子遇到你真是三生有幸啊
Penny:you know,I’ve done this before in kindergarten.i was supposed to marry Jason Sorensen at recess,but by the time my class got out there,he was already engaged to Chelsea himmelfarb.so what did I do? the monkey bars, let all the boys see my underpants.
你知道吗？我以前就犯过这种错，在幼儿园的时候，我本来要在下课期间嫁给杰森·索伦森，但等同学们都出来的时候，他已经和切尔西·辛莫法订婚了。知道我怎么做吗？我倒挂在猴架上，让全部男生看我内裤。
Amy:you can’t blame yourself when your prefrontal cortex fails to make you happy.promiscuity rewards you with the needed flood of dopamine-we neurobiologists refer to this as the “skank reflex”.
你不能责怪自己，当你的前额皮质无法使你开心时滥交能给你带来大量所需的多巴胺。我们神经生物学家称之为“下流反射”
Penny:you know what?let’s get out of here.
这样吧，我们出去玩
Amy:where are we going?
我们去哪玩
Penny:somewhere where no one’s seen me naked.we may have to drive a while. 去没有人看过我裸体的地方，可能得开一会车才行
Sheldon:subtlety isn’t her strong suit,is it?
聪敏就不是她的强项对吧
Penny:can I stay at your place for a few nights?
我能去你家睡几晚吗
Amy:really? A best friend sleepover? Yay.
真的吗？闺蜜来过夜，好耶
Penny:yeah,sure,yay!
当然，好耶
Amy:we’ll make popcorn,stay up all night,and I’ll teach you my secret language.op.
我们弄点爆米花，玩他个通宵。我会教你说我的密语，表嗷话
Penny:sounds great.
听上去不错
Amy:nope,sounds “gtop rop e a top”.
错，应该是听上去“表嗷错哦”
Penny:yeah,t’m gonna go back a bag.
好耶，我去收个包
Amy:no, you’re not,you’re gonno “pop a cop kop a bop a gop”. 不，错了，你是去“收个表嗷哦”
Leonard:do we really have to wear the camouflage crap to play paintball? 我们真要穿这蠢爆了的迷彩服去打彩弹吗
Sheldon:who said that?leonard,I can heard your voice,but I can’t see you. 谁在说话？莱纳德，我能听到你但看不到你
Leonard:I’m not in the mood, Sheldon.
我没那心情，谢尔顿
Sheldon:oh,there you are!leonard,I know you’re upset about recent events
and I have someone here to help.
哎呀，你在这啊。莱纳德，我知道你为最近的事不开心，所以我找了人来帮你 Leonard:I don’t want to talk to amy.
我不想和艾米说话
Sheldon:no,it’s not amy.
不，那不是艾米
L’mum:hello,dear.
你好，宝贝
Leonard:you called my mother.
你叫了我妈
Sheldon:oh,Leonard,is it nexessary to caption the obvious?
莱纳德，非要说的这么明显吗
L’mum:he’s been like that since he was a toddler.look,mommy—a butterfly,maddening.
他还是小孩时就这样了。看啊，妈咪，一只蝴蝶，真闹心
Leonard:what’s going on?what do you want.
怎么了，你有什么事
L’mum:Sheldon informed me that you’re experiencing an emotional uphearal and I’m here to help.
谢尔顿告诉我说 你正在遭遇感情上的剧变，所以我来帮忙
Leonard:that’s so nice.
你真贴心
L’mum:and we’ve back to the obvious.now,what’s up?
这不又是明摆着的么。好吧，怎么了
Leonard:well„uh.okay.i don’t want to get back together with penny,we tried it,it was crazy,it didn’t work.but I can’t deal with the fact that she slept with my friend raj,and the I find out the raj’sister priya who I’ve been going out with eight mouths is wrong back ti Indian.so I’mjust completely confused and alone.
那个 额„我不想和佩妮复合，我们尝试过，很疯狂，效果很糟糕，但我也不能接受她和我朋友拉杰上床了，我还发现拉杰的妹妹普里亚，我和她交往了八个月，而她现在要回印度，所以我完全迷茫和寂寞了。
L’mum:I understand.
我理解
Leonard:got any advice?
有什么建议吗
L’mum:yes,buck up!
当然有啦，振作起来
Leonard:excuse me,you’re a world-renowned expert in parenting and child development and all you’re got is “buck up”?
啥？你是一个世界知名的育儿和儿童成长专家，能给的建议就是“振作起来”吗？ L’mum:sorry,buck up,sissy pants.
不好意思，振作起来，小娘跑
Leonard:thanks,mother,I feel much better.
多谢，妈妈，我感觉好多了
L’mum:if you need any more help from me.my books are available on amazon.logging off!
如果你需要我的更多帮助，就去亚马逊上买我的书。下了
Amy: ninety-nine,one hundred.it’s like a waterfall of liquid gold,my turn.
99,100，秀发如瀑布一般倾泻而下。轮到我了。
Penny:you know,I don’t even know what the point of me satying in L.A. I haven’t gotten a single acting job since I moved out here.the close I came was last mouth I got a callback for a hemorrhoid commercial. 我都不知道我干嘛要住在洛杉矶，自我搬到这后连一次演员工作机会都没有。最接近的就是上个月，一个做痔疮广告的打了电话给我
Amy:oh,I could so see you being the face of hemorrhoids.
我能感觉你那张脸演得了痔疮的会很传神
Penny:I know,right?maybe I should just move back to Nebraska. 你也觉得吧，我是不是干脆搬回内布拉斯加得了
Amy:no,I can’t let you do that.
不，你不能这么做
Penny；why not?
为什么
Amy:for the first time ever,I habe a thriving social life,and no pressure ,but it kind of lives and dies with you.
有史以来第一次我的社会生活蒸蒸日上，不是给你压力，但你要是走了，这一切都完了
Raj:hi,amy,can I talk to penny?
你好，艾米，我能和佩妮谈谈吗
Amy:a guest in my trunale bed and a boy at my door? I wish I could tell 13-year-old me “it does get better”.
我的滚轮床有人来睡，还有男生来我家。我真想穿越回去告诉十三岁的我“真的会好起来的”
Penny:how did you know I was here ?
你怎么知道我在这里
Raj:it’s all over her facebook page.
她的facebook都写了
Amy:I’ll take your stuff to the bedroom,and clear out a dramer. 我把你的东西搬进卧室，再把抽屉整理一下
Penny:thanks.
谢啦
Amy:no problem,try and keep it in your pants,okay?
没事，这次管好你的裤子，好吗？
Penny:so,hi,what’s up?
你好，有事吗
Raj:I was wondering if you’re free Friday.they’reholding a totally 80s night at the greek.hall&oates,Katrina and the waves,and three-fifths of
kajagoogoo.
不知道你周五有没有空？周五在格里克有个八十年代之夜，有霍尔与奥兹二重唱，卡特琳娜还有卡家狗狗组合里的三个人
Penny:gee,that’s really sweet,but the thing is?
这真的很不错，但问题是„
Raj:aw,there’s a thing.
有问题了
Penny:look,honey,I was really drunk and made a huge mistake last night.we should’ve never slept together.it’s what ruins friendships.
听我解释，亲爱的，昨晚我醉得很厉害才犯了一个很严重的错误，我们绝不该发生这种关系，这会毁了我们的友谊的
Raj:you can’t ruin a friendship with sex.that’s like trying to ruin ice cream with chocolate sprinkles.
做爱是毁不了友谊的。就好像巧克力屑不会毁了冰淇淋一样
Penny:come here,just listen to me. I want to go back to the way we were before,you know,friend,no sprinkles.
来，坐下来，听我说。我想时光倒流，回到我们从前那样，当朋友，不放巧克力屑
Raj:all right.
好吧
Penny:thank you.
谢谢
Raj:as your friend,you might like to know that,um„we didn’t have sex in the conwentional sense.
作为朋友，我要告诉你，传统意义上来说，我们没有做爱
Penny:oh,god,did you pull some weird Indian crap on me?
天啊，你对我做了什么怪异的印度花样吗
Raj:no,no,after we got undressed and jumped in bed you-you asked if I had protection.
不 不是的，我们脱光衣服上床之后，你问了我有没有带安全套
Penny:oh,you did,didn’t you?
哦，你一定带了是吧
Raj:of course,I’m always packing anyway.um.i had trouble putting it on ,and you tried to help and that was all she wrote.
当然，我一向随身带着的。总之，当时我有点带不上套子你就想来帮我，然后，就没有然后了
Penny:so,we didn’t actually.
所以，我们其实没有
Raj:I did,it was beautiful.penny,please,please,promise me you won’t tell anybody about this.
我射了，感觉很美妙。佩妮，求求你答应我不会告诉任何人
Penny:of course.i won’t,no,I won’t.
当然 一定不说
Raj:oh,good,um„can t tell people that our love burned too bright and too
quickly?kind of a “candle in the wind”deal?
太好了，我可不可以告诉别人。我们的爱燃烧太快，转瞬即逝，就像“风中之烛”那样
Penny:sure.
当然可以
Raj:cool,can I say it fell apart because you were all “I want to have babies” and I was like I am too rock and roll to be tied down？
酷，我可以说我们分手，是因为你一直嚷嚷着想要孩子，而我觉得自己还要继续流浪不能安定下来吗？
Penny:no.
不行
Raj:can I stay I ruined you for white men?
我可以说因为你是白种人，所以甩了我吗
Penny:also no.
还是不行
Raj:okay,just the candle thing.
好吧 就说风中烛那个吧
Penny:yeah.
对
Raj:cool,all right,friend I see you allowed.
酷 好吧 如果你允许我会来看你的
Penny:okay.
好的
Raj:wait,thank you for being my friend.penny,it’s getting beautiful again.
等等。谢谢你把我当朋友， 拉杰：佩妮，我又开始觉得美妙了
Sheldon:all right,this is a google earth view of the field of battle. 好了，这是本战场的“谷歌地球”画面
Howard:I don’t see anything.
我什么都没看见
Sheldon:give it a second to load,whenever you’re ready AT&T.okay,here we go.this is us here to the south is professor Loomis and the gedogy department.according to there twitter feed.they’ve out of sunblock which means they’ll have to hug the tree line or risk melanoma.that’s our edge.all we to do is more quickly ever the ridge,the rock-worshipping post-faced bastard won’t know what hit them!all right,let’s move out. 等一会，在载入。可以了吧，AT&T（美国电话电报公司），好了，来吧。我们在这，南面是卢米斯教授和地质系诸人。据其twitter记录，他们没防晒霜了，就是说他们要不躲在林木线下，不然就有得黑色素瘤危险。这就是我们的优势。我们只要快速穿过这个山脊，就能把这帮崇拜石头苍白脸色的混蛋出其不意的击倒。好了，出发吧
Leonard:hang on,Sheldon,how could you not tell me your sister was moving back to india?
等等，谢尔顿，你怎么能不告诉我你妹妹要回印度？
Howard:maybe he was too busy,writing clumsy penis metaphors about my fiancé.
也许他当时正忙着写关于我未婚妻的拙劣阴茎隐喻
Raj:screw you.that was a beautifully written penis metaphors. 滚你的，那明明是绝妙的阴茎隐喻
Leonard:you know what,guys,I’m not in the mood fot paintball what do you say we just bag it?
各位，我实在没心情打彩弹球，不如我们直接当逃兵吧
Howard:fine,with me
我同意
Raj:sure,whatever.
好吧 随便
Sheldon:you can’t quit. That’s a court-martial offense.that’s punishment by„ you can’t quit.
不能当逃兵，这样是要交军事法庭审判的罪行，可被判处 反正不行
Leonard:sorry,Sheldon,it’s just hot a good time for playing games. 抱歉 谢尔顿，现在玩彩弹球游戏实在不是时候
Sheldon:this is a game to you？
你以为这是游戏吗
Leonard:yes.
是
Sheldon:wait,I just want you all to know that I fogive you.this mutiny isn’t your fault,it’s mine.i haven’t earned these bars.although what I lack in leadship apparently I more than make up for in security. 慢着，我只是想你们知道，我原谅你们了。这次叛变不是你们的错，是我的问题，我配不上这些两道杠（军衔）。显然我的领导才能的不足全弥补在缝纫技术上了
Howard:let it go,Sheldon.i’ll get you a jamba juice on the way home. 算了吧 谢尔顿，回家的路上我会给你买杯丈八的果汁的
Sheldon:no, jamba juice is for heroes.and that’s what we ‘ve going to be.
不要，丈八果汁是给英雄喝得。所以我们要当英雄
Leonard:what are you dong?
你要干嘛
Sheldon:following in the footsteps of kirk,crunch and kangaroo.gedogy isn’t a real science.
步科克船长和嘎嘣脆船长以及袋鼠船长的后尘。地质学不是真正的科学 Howard:damn those son of bitches! Let’s get em. Eat paint.
那帮混球太过分了 干掉他们 尝尝老子的厉害
Sheldon:if there’s ever a church of Sheldon,this will be when it started,ow!
如果将来有谢尔顿党的话，那应该就是从此刻成立的 哎呦喂
Leonard:I’d like to propose a toast to the man whose noble sacrifice inspired our vitory.captain Sheldon cooper.
让我们为英雄举杯，正是他悲壮的牺牲，我们才能赢得胜利。感谢谢尔顿·库帕
上尉
Sheldon:excuse me,it’s major Sheldon cooper,with my last breath,I awarded
myself a battlefield promotion,it’s kind of a big deal.
抱歉，应该是谢尔顿·库帕少校。为了犒赏在沙场上的英勇，我用残存的一口气
给自己升了一级官，这也算小有成就吧
Penny:hi,you guys have a minute?
嗨 你们有时间吗
Leonard:uh,yeah,sure.
当然有
Penny:ok ,well,I already talked to raj but I wanted to apologize to the
vest of you for. You know everything.
好的，我已经跟拉杰谈过了，但是我想向你们其他几个道歉，为之前的一切做个
解释
Raj:please,penny,let me,we’ve decide to let our crazy,wonderful night
together be just one of those memories you have.and can call to mind when
you’re feeling blue or you’re in the shower.
拜托 佩妮，让我来说吧，我们决定让那晚既疯狂又美好的春宵成为大家心里最
美好的回忆。当你们心情低落或洗澡时可以拿出来回味一下
Penny:hey,what you doing,quick draw?
你这是干什么 三分钟先生
Raj:sorry,go on.
抱歉 你请说
Penny；anyways,I wanted you guys all to know that I’ve been talking a
really hard look at things.and come to the conclusion I have to stop
kidding myself.i suck at acting.it’s time for me to more back to Nebraska.
总之，我来是想告诉大家，我很认真的审视了一遍自己，于是得出一个结论，我
不能在自欺欺人了，我根本不会演戏，是时候卷铺盖回家了
Leonard:you’re leaving?
你要走吗
Penny:yeah.
对
Howard:what are you going to do in Nebraska?
你准备回内布拉斯加做什么
Penny:I don’t know,maybe teach acting,sorry hold on.
不知道 或许教表演吧。抱歉 稍等
Leonard:penny,listen,I hope you’re not doing this cause of you and
me,because I have a girlfriend and you’re a single woman.
佩妮，听着，我不希望你是因为我才走的。因为我有女友相伴，而你只能孤芳自
赏
Penny:shh!it’s my agent. it’s my agent.you’re kidding me.oh,my gosh.i
can’t believe it ,really?oh,I’m so excited.thank you. Thank you very
much.ok.bye.i got the hemorrhoid commercial!i start Monday.
别吵，我经纪人打来的，你开什么玩笑。天啊，我简直不敢相信，真的吗？我太
激动了，谢谢 非常感谢。好 再见。我接了个痔疮广告，周一开拍
Sheldon:what about Nebraska?
那内布拉斯加呢
Penny:oh,hell with Nebraska.i’m gonna be a star.
鬼才回内布拉斯加呢。姐要当明星了
Sheldon:have you ever though of teaching physics?
你有考虑过教物理吗？
班级: 商务英语1班
饶烺