1. 过多主观性语言和议论
例文1：
Direction:
Some people like to travel alone; others like to travel together with several friends. Which do you prefer and why?
On traveling alone
As transport and communication become ever more convenient, more and more people are spending their leisure time traveling. Lots of cities now have perfect network for helping tourists to visit and recreate: travel agency, traveling routines and tourist guide, hotels, buses and airplanes. Despite the convenience provided by tourist only be gained when individual is given chances of practicing himself. Boredom and loneliness during a protracted stay in a foreign land might force the tourist to get out and make friends with the locals. A needs first to make friends with people in that place.
The single tourist also has more freedom in choosing how long he should linger in the place he is intoxicated in and where he doesn’t choice.
All this is not to say that traveling with friends is childish and useless. Two couples traveling as a foursome can have a deep
wonderful vacation. But, in terms of hard-won experience, it is the solitary traveler who returns enriched.
因为这篇文章的提纲中明确要求写作者表明自己的选择，所以第一段结尾处的“我”的观点的表白是完全必要的。但是在后来的每一段中，作者都在重申自己喜欢单独旅游的理由，这样是文章充满了主观的味道，这是native speaker 所忌讳的手法。此外，文章结尾的语言也有些画蛇添足的味道，因为文章的中心是独自旅游的好处，而结论处却又提出两个人结伴旅游也是不无好处的。
2. 个人体会作为论据
在表明个人观点时，还有一种误解，即把个人的经验或体会作为文章主要的论据，这样做文章就失去了代表性，从而失去了客观性。在写议论文的时候，写作者不能像下面的这篇例文一样来安排论据：
Which is More Important, Work or Money？
Such a question will often pose in front of us: will you choose to quit your job if you become a millionaire overnight? It’s undeniable that many people will cast their preference to staying freely at home without pressure from work. But the overwhelming majority of people would find that work is the source of pleasure and the important means of realizing self-satisfaction in life.
for instance. Before hooking 5 million Yuan by buying lottery ticket, he felt exhausted everyday due to the work in office. The unexpected fortune made him exhilarant and he decided to quit his job. At first, he did feel free and happy because of liberation from hustling and bustling life pace. And he spent time playing computer games, traveling in foreign countries and shopping or chatting with friends. But as time goes on , he was tired of this kind of idle life and began to envy those who had got job. At last, he went back to his post and resumed his former position.
A job is more than a regular paycheck. Having a job helps to fulfill one’s life’s aim.
从外表来看，这篇文章没出现语法错误，而且开头和结尾部分的语言也处理的比较干净利落，开头用问题的方式表明了观点；结尾与开头相互呼应，用简单明了的语言重申了工作对人生的重要性。但是在主体段的证明过程中，通篇引用的是某一个人的具体实例，不具有代表性，也充满了记叙的味道，这是和议论文的要求格格不入的。
3. 空喊口号，论据不足
议论文中如果事实论据太少，而只是靠空喊口号会使文章显得尤为空洞。有的写作者喜欢表立场，下决心，用政治色彩很浓的词语，这些都有违于以理服人的原则。
We student are the future masters of our country. We have a great duty to perform, that is, to make our country prosperous. Therefore，
goal. We must improve ourselves to a high standard of morality, cultivate good manners, be faithful to our Party and country, honest and just to everyone, store up knowledge, and take regular physical exercises to keep strong.
4. 过多使用口语化语言
为了增强语言的表现力，议论文中要减少口语色彩的词汇和语言结构的使用，不要总使用诸如if, because, when, don’t, can’t 等口语意味较重的句子；减少I think, you, we，us 等表示个人行为的语言的频率。
我们所熟悉的很多词虽然在口语中很常用，但是在议论文中会影响文章的表现力。下面的两组词中，后者多用于口语化的语言里，所以第一组的表现力要强于第二组：
commerce begin
profound deep
fortunate lucky
terminate end
proceed begin/ continue
elevate raise
gratuitous unnecessary
explicit clear
identical same
erudite learned
endeavor try
eccentric strange
conceive regard
controversy discussion
advocate favor
remarkable sharp
ponder wonder
我们还可以通过一些例句来进一步了解这种区别。
例1：
think 是一个弱表现力的词汇：
Many people think that this practice is a waste of human resources. 可以选择一些其他表现力强的词汇：
Many people acknowledge that this practice is a waste of human resources.
Many people hold the view that this practice is a waste of human resources.
Many people maintain the standing point of view that this practice is a waste of human resources.
Many people conceive that this practice is a waste of human resources.
例2：
more and more是个表现力弱的短语：
More and more people have become conscious of the importance of environment protection.
可以把这个短语换成其他形式：
environment protection.
People in increasing numbers are conscious of the importance of environment protection.
Booming groups of people are conscious of the importance of environment protection.
People ’s consciousness on the importance of environment protection is on the rise.
例3：
most 是个口语化的表现“大多数”的概念的词汇：
Most of the teachers are devoted to their career.
可以把这个句子改成以下形式：
The vast majority of the teachers are devoted to their career.
The considerable proportion of teachers are devoted to their jobs.
A large percentage of the teachers are devoted to their jobs.
例4：
not only…but also的表现力也较弱：
He is not only a successful businessman but also a dutiful father. 可以把这个句子改成下面的形式：
He is a successful businessman as well as a dutiful father.
He is a successful businessman as much as a dutiful father.
5. 其他因素
影响议论文表现力的因素还有很多，还需要注意以下方面：
(1) 缩写形式的使用
诸如don ’t, mustn’t , she’s, I’ve 等词通常都用于非正式的语体，而不适用于议论文。在议论文中，最好用cannot, do not, must not等全写形式。
(2) 人称指代
在表现力弱或非议论文的文章中，经常使用you 来泛指“人”这个概念，而在议论文中，最后把它换成代表性广的“one ”；用“everyone, everybody, someone, somebody, anyone ”等来代替“they ”，都会起到增强文章表现力的作用。
(3) 动词代替动词短语
动词短语多用于口语化或者非正式文体中，而动词则表现力更强一些。在议论文的写作过程中，要多使用后者，少用前者。如：
go on continue
carry on continue
look into investigate
come across meet
put up with bear
get away escape
turn out produce
(4) 从句引导词
如果注意从句的引导词的使用，语体会变得更加正式一些，如宾语从句的引导词“that ”最后不省略掉；定语从句的who 要比whom 更正式一些。
(5) 分词结构与句子的选择
在下面的各组句子中，第一个句子的表现力要弱于第二个句子，因为第二个句子采取了分词结构。
When I heard of the news of the air crash, I was shocked to death.
Hearing of the news of the air crash, I was shocked to death.
I want to give him a hand. I know he is in dilemma now.
I want to give him a hand, knowing he is in dilemma now.
He was bed-ridden after he was seriously hurt in the car accident. He was bed-ridden after badly hurt in the car accident.
(6) 各种句式的选择
如果能在文章中交互使用长句（long sentence ），复合句(compound-complex sentence) ，排比句(sentence with parallel constructions) ，平衡句(balanced sentence) 或掉尾句(periodic sentence) ， 句子的表现力自然会增强。但是需要注意不能一味的追求这些句式的使用，而认为简单句只适用于非正式文体，否则会使文章变得晦涩。
1. 过多主观性语言和议论
例文1：
Direction:
Some people like to travel alone; others like to travel together with several friends. Which do you prefer and why?
On traveling alone
As transport and communication become ever more convenient, more and more people are spending their leisure time traveling. Lots of cities now have perfect network for helping tourists to visit and recreate: travel agency, traveling routines and tourist guide, hotels, buses and airplanes. Despite the convenience provided by tourist only be gained when individual is given chances of practicing himself. Boredom and loneliness during a protracted stay in a foreign land might force the tourist to get out and make friends with the locals. A needs first to make friends with people in that place.
The single tourist also has more freedom in choosing how long he should linger in the place he is intoxicated in and where he doesn’t choice.
All this is not to say that traveling with friends is childish and useless. Two couples traveling as a foursome can have a deep
wonderful vacation. But, in terms of hard-won experience, it is the solitary traveler who returns enriched.
因为这篇文章的提纲中明确要求写作者表明自己的选择，所以第一段结尾处的“我”的观点的表白是完全必要的。但是在后来的每一段中，作者都在重申自己喜欢单独旅游的理由，这样是文章充满了主观的味道，这是native speaker 所忌讳的手法。此外，文章结尾的语言也有些画蛇添足的味道，因为文章的中心是独自旅游的好处，而结论处却又提出两个人结伴旅游也是不无好处的。
2. 个人体会作为论据
在表明个人观点时，还有一种误解，即把个人的经验或体会作为文章主要的论据，这样做文章就失去了代表性，从而失去了客观性。在写议论文的时候，写作者不能像下面的这篇例文一样来安排论据：
Which is More Important, Work or Money？
Such a question will often pose in front of us: will you choose to quit your job if you become a millionaire overnight? It’s undeniable that many people will cast their preference to staying freely at home without pressure from work. But the overwhelming majority of people would find that work is the source of pleasure and the important means of realizing self-satisfaction in life.
for instance. Before hooking 5 million Yuan by buying lottery ticket, he felt exhausted everyday due to the work in office. The unexpected fortune made him exhilarant and he decided to quit his job. At first, he did feel free and happy because of liberation from hustling and bustling life pace. And he spent time playing computer games, traveling in foreign countries and shopping or chatting with friends. But as time goes on , he was tired of this kind of idle life and began to envy those who had got job. At last, he went back to his post and resumed his former position.
A job is more than a regular paycheck. Having a job helps to fulfill one’s life’s aim.
从外表来看，这篇文章没出现语法错误，而且开头和结尾部分的语言也处理的比较干净利落，开头用问题的方式表明了观点；结尾与开头相互呼应，用简单明了的语言重申了工作对人生的重要性。但是在主体段的证明过程中，通篇引用的是某一个人的具体实例，不具有代表性，也充满了记叙的味道，这是和议论文的要求格格不入的。
3. 空喊口号，论据不足
议论文中如果事实论据太少，而只是靠空喊口号会使文章显得尤为空洞。有的写作者喜欢表立场，下决心，用政治色彩很浓的词语，这些都有违于以理服人的原则。
We student are the future masters of our country. We have a great duty to perform, that is, to make our country prosperous. Therefore，
goal. We must improve ourselves to a high standard of morality, cultivate good manners, be faithful to our Party and country, honest and just to everyone, store up knowledge, and take regular physical exercises to keep strong.
4. 过多使用口语化语言
为了增强语言的表现力，议论文中要减少口语色彩的词汇和语言结构的使用，不要总使用诸如if, because, when, don’t, can’t 等口语意味较重的句子；减少I think, you, we，us 等表示个人行为的语言的频率。
我们所熟悉的很多词虽然在口语中很常用，但是在议论文中会影响文章的表现力。下面的两组词中，后者多用于口语化的语言里，所以第一组的表现力要强于第二组：
commerce begin
profound deep
fortunate lucky
terminate end
proceed begin/ continue
elevate raise
gratuitous unnecessary
explicit clear
identical same
erudite learned
endeavor try
eccentric strange
conceive regard
controversy discussion
advocate favor
remarkable sharp
ponder wonder
我们还可以通过一些例句来进一步了解这种区别。
例1：
think 是一个弱表现力的词汇：
Many people think that this practice is a waste of human resources. 可以选择一些其他表现力强的词汇：
Many people acknowledge that this practice is a waste of human resources.
Many people hold the view that this practice is a waste of human resources.
Many people maintain the standing point of view that this practice is a waste of human resources.
Many people conceive that this practice is a waste of human resources.
例2：
more and more是个表现力弱的短语：
More and more people have become conscious of the importance of environment protection.
可以把这个短语换成其他形式：
environment protection.
People in increasing numbers are conscious of the importance of environment protection.
Booming groups of people are conscious of the importance of environment protection.
People ’s consciousness on the importance of environment protection is on the rise.
例3：
most 是个口语化的表现“大多数”的概念的词汇：
Most of the teachers are devoted to their career.
可以把这个句子改成以下形式：
The vast majority of the teachers are devoted to their career.
The considerable proportion of teachers are devoted to their jobs.
A large percentage of the teachers are devoted to their jobs.
例4：
not only…but also的表现力也较弱：
He is not only a successful businessman but also a dutiful father. 可以把这个句子改成下面的形式：
He is a successful businessman as well as a dutiful father.
He is a successful businessman as much as a dutiful father.
5. 其他因素
影响议论文表现力的因素还有很多，还需要注意以下方面：
(1) 缩写形式的使用
诸如don ’t, mustn’t , she’s, I’ve 等词通常都用于非正式的语体，而不适用于议论文。在议论文中，最好用cannot, do not, must not等全写形式。
(2) 人称指代
在表现力弱或非议论文的文章中，经常使用you 来泛指“人”这个概念，而在议论文中，最后把它换成代表性广的“one ”；用“everyone, everybody, someone, somebody, anyone ”等来代替“they ”，都会起到增强文章表现力的作用。
(3) 动词代替动词短语
动词短语多用于口语化或者非正式文体中，而动词则表现力更强一些。在议论文的写作过程中，要多使用后者，少用前者。如：
go on continue
carry on continue
look into investigate
come across meet
put up with bear
get away escape
turn out produce
(4) 从句引导词
如果注意从句的引导词的使用，语体会变得更加正式一些，如宾语从句的引导词“that ”最后不省略掉；定语从句的who 要比whom 更正式一些。
(5) 分词结构与句子的选择
在下面的各组句子中，第一个句子的表现力要弱于第二个句子，因为第二个句子采取了分词结构。
When I heard of the news of the air crash, I was shocked to death.
Hearing of the news of the air crash, I was shocked to death.
I want to give him a hand. I know he is in dilemma now.
I want to give him a hand, knowing he is in dilemma now.
He was bed-ridden after he was seriously hurt in the car accident. He was bed-ridden after badly hurt in the car accident.
(6) 各种句式的选择
如果能在文章中交互使用长句（long sentence ），复合句(compound-complex sentence) ，排比句(sentence with parallel constructions) ，平衡句(balanced sentence) 或掉尾句(periodic sentence) ， 句子的表现力自然会增强。但是需要注意不能一味的追求这些句式的使用，而认为简单句只适用于非正式文体，否则会使文章变得晦涩。