my little dog can't read
Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!
Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!
Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.
我的狗不识字
布朗夫人：哦，
亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了！
史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊！
布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。”
Two Birds
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher: Please tell us.
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
两只鸟
老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？
学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。
老师：请说说看。
学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
（1）
A lady opened her refrigerator and saw a rabbit sitting on one of the shelves, "What are you doing in there?" she asked.
一位女士打开冰箱门，发现一只兔子坐在其中的一层隔板上，就问它：“你在那里做什么？” The rabbit replied, "This is a Westinghouse, isn't it?"
兔子回答：“这是Westinghouse 对不对？”（Westinghouse ，西屋电气公司）
The lady confirmed, "Yes."
女士确认道：“没错。”
"Well," the rabbit said,"I'm westing."
兔子说：“那就对了，我就是要往西边去。”
（2）
Rabbit: Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me?
兔子：你确信这瓶特制胡萝卜汁能治好我的病？
Doctor: Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another.
医生：当然咯，凡是喝过的兔子没有一只来要第二瓶的。
（3）
Baby Rabbit: Mommy, where did I come from?
兔宝宝：妈咪，我是从哪儿来的呢？
Mother Rabbit: I'll tell you when you're older.
兔妈妈：等你长大点再告诉你。
Baby Rabbit: Oh, Mommy, please, tell me now.
兔宝宝：噢，妈咪，现在就告诉我吧，求您了。
Mother Rabbit: If you must know, you were pulled from a magician's hat.
兔妈妈：如果你一定要知道，那我告诉你你是从魔术师的帽子里被拽出来的。
He Won
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？
约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？
约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！”
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。
A bad beginning makes a bad ending.
不善始者不善终。
A bad thing never dies.
遗臭万年。
A bad workman always blames his tools.
不会撑船怪河弯。
A bird in the hand is worth than two in the bush.
一鸟在手胜过双鸟在林。
A boaster and a liar are cousins-german.
吹牛与说谎本是同宗。
A bully is always a coward.
色厉内荏。
Do not , for one repulse , give up the purpose that you resolved to effect .(William Shakespeare , British dramatist)
不要只因一次失败，就放弃你原来决心想达到的目的。(英国剧作家 莎士比亚.W.)
Don't part with your illusions . When they are gone you may still exist , but you have ceased to live. (Mark Twain , American writer)
不要放弃你的幻想。当幻想没有了以后，你还可以生存，但是你虽生犹死。（(美国作家 马克? 吐温)
I want to bring out the secrets of nature and apply them for the happiness of man . I don't know of any better service to offer for the short time we are in the world .(Thomas Edison , American inventor)
我想揭示大自然的秘密，用来造福人类。我认为，在我们的短暂一生中，最好的贡献莫过于此了。 (美国发明家 爱迪生. T.)
Ideal is the beacon. Without ideal , there is no secure direction ; without direction , there is no life .( Leo Tolstoy , Russian writer)
理想是指路明灯。没有理想，就没有坚定的方向；没有方向，就没有生活。
(俄国作家 托尔斯泰. L .)
If winter comes , can spring be far behind ?( Shelley , British poet )
冬天来了，春天还会远吗？( 英国诗人, 雪莱.)
If you doubt yourself , then indeed you stand on shaky11 ground .( Ibsen , Norwegian dramatist ) 如果你怀疑自己，那么你的立足点确实不稳固了。 (挪威剧作家 易卜生)
Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
老师:为什么你每天早晨都迟到?
汤姆:每当我经过学校的拐角处, 就看见一个牌子上写着" 学校----慢行".
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
一、英语谜语
1．what man cannot live in a house?
什么人不能住在房子里?
Key ： snowman （雪人）
2．What never asks questions but gets a lot of answers?
什么东西永远不问问题但是却能得到很多答案?
Key ： dictionary （字典）
3．What question can you never answer "Yes" to?
什么问题你永远也不能回答" 是"
Key ： Are you dead?（你死了吗? ）
4、You have it．You read it．There're some pictures in it?
你拥有它，你可以阅读它，它有些图片在里面，它是什么?
Key ： book （书）
5、A mouse has a large pocket． What is it?
一种鼠有一个大袋子，它是什么?
Key ： a kangaroo（袋鼠）
6、It has a head ，but no neck．It has a body，but no warmth．NO feet，but can travel? 它有头，但没有脖子，有身体，但不温暖，没有脚，却能旅行。
Key ： a car（汽车）
二、英语小故事小幽默
狮子和老鼠 THE LION AND THE MOUSE
Lion was awakened from sleep by a Mouse running over his face. Rising up in anger, he caught him and was about to kill him, when the Mouse piteously entreated, saying： “If you would only spare my life, I would be sure to repay your kindness.” The Lion laughed and let him go.
It happened shortly after this that the Lion was caught by some hunters, who bound him by strong ropes to the ground. The Mouse, recognizing his roar, came up, and gnawed the rope with his teeth, and setting him free, exclaimed: “You ridiculed the idea of my ever being able to help you, not expecting to receive from me any repayment of your favor ； but now you know that it is
possible for even a Mouse to confer benefits on a Lion.”
一只老鼠从一只狮子面前跑过去，将它从梦中吵醒。狮子生气地跳起来，捉住老鼠，要弄死它。老鼠哀求说：“只要你肯饶恕我这条小生命，我将来一定会报答你的大恩。”狮子便笑着放了它。
后来狮子被几个猎人捉住，用粗绳捆绑倒在地上。老鼠听出是狮子的吼声，走来用牙齿咬断绳索，释放了他，并大声说：“你当时嘲笑我想帮你的忙，而且也不指望我有什么机会报答。但是你现在知道了，就算是小老鼠，也能向狮子效劳的。”
三、英语有趣的字词
Tit for tat：针锋相对
Tweedledum and tweedledee：半斤八两
hum and haw：表示犹豫或支吾的嗯嗯呃呃声
cling-clang ：叮当作响，铿锵声。
rat-tat, rat-a-rat, rat-tat -tat：（敲门的）砰砰声。
Flip-flop ：啪嗒啪嗒地响（动）
Zigzag ：弯弯曲曲
Hotch-potch ：大杂烩
Criss-cross ：纵横交错
Helter-skelter ：慌慌张张
Shilly-shally ：犹犹豫豫
Chit-chat ：拉呱
Dillydally ：磨磨蹭蹭
Tittle-tattle ：嚼舌头，搬弄是非
Higgledy-piggledy ：乱七八糟
Walkie-talkie ：步话机
Job-hop ：跳槽
apple 掌上明珠
green monster 嫉妒的人
ouch potato 懒虫
a cat nap 打盹儿
a social butterfly 善于交际的人
red tape 官僚主义
cat`s pow 被别人利用的人
my little dog can't read
Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!
Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!
Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.
我的狗不识字
布朗夫人：哦，
亲爱的，我把珍爱的小狗给丢了！
史密斯夫人：可是你该在报纸上登广告啊！
布朗夫人：没有用的，我的小狗不认识字。”
Two Birds
Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?
Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.
Teacher: Please tell us.
Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.
两只鸟
老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？
学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。
老师：请说说看。
学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。
（1）
A lady opened her refrigerator and saw a rabbit sitting on one of the shelves, "What are you doing in there?" she asked.
一位女士打开冰箱门，发现一只兔子坐在其中的一层隔板上，就问它：“你在那里做什么？” The rabbit replied, "This is a Westinghouse, isn't it?"
兔子回答：“这是Westinghouse 对不对？”（Westinghouse ，西屋电气公司）
The lady confirmed, "Yes."
女士确认道：“没错。”
"Well," the rabbit said,"I'm westing."
兔子说：“那就对了，我就是要往西边去。”
（2）
Rabbit: Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me?
兔子：你确信这瓶特制胡萝卜汁能治好我的病？
Doctor: Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another.
医生：当然咯，凡是喝过的兔子没有一只来要第二瓶的。
（3）
Baby Rabbit: Mommy, where did I come from?
兔宝宝：妈咪，我是从哪儿来的呢？
Mother Rabbit: I'll tell you when you're older.
兔妈妈：等你长大点再告诉你。
Baby Rabbit: Oh, Mommy, please, tell me now.
兔宝宝：噢，妈咪，现在就告诉我吧，求您了。
Mother Rabbit: If you must know, you were pulled from a magician's hat.
兔妈妈：如果你一定要知道，那我告诉你你是从魔术师的帽子里被拽出来的。
He Won
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？
约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？
约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？”
“一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！”
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。
A bad beginning makes a bad ending.
不善始者不善终。
A bad thing never dies.
遗臭万年。
A bad workman always blames his tools.
不会撑船怪河弯。
A bird in the hand is worth than two in the bush.
一鸟在手胜过双鸟在林。
A boaster and a liar are cousins-german.
吹牛与说谎本是同宗。
A bully is always a coward.
色厉内荏。
Do not , for one repulse , give up the purpose that you resolved to effect .(William Shakespeare , British dramatist)
不要只因一次失败，就放弃你原来决心想达到的目的。(英国剧作家 莎士比亚.W.)
Don't part with your illusions . When they are gone you may still exist , but you have ceased to live. (Mark Twain , American writer)
不要放弃你的幻想。当幻想没有了以后，你还可以生存，但是你虽生犹死。（(美国作家 马克? 吐温)
I want to bring out the secrets of nature and apply them for the happiness of man . I don't know of any better service to offer for the short time we are in the world .(Thomas Edison , American inventor)
我想揭示大自然的秘密，用来造福人类。我认为，在我们的短暂一生中，最好的贡献莫过于此了。 (美国发明家 爱迪生. T.)
Ideal is the beacon. Without ideal , there is no secure direction ; without direction , there is no life .( Leo Tolstoy , Russian writer)
理想是指路明灯。没有理想，就没有坚定的方向；没有方向，就没有生活。
(俄国作家 托尔斯泰. L .)
If winter comes , can spring be far behind ?( Shelley , British poet )
冬天来了，春天还会远吗？( 英国诗人, 雪莱.)
If you doubt yourself , then indeed you stand on shaky11 ground .( Ibsen , Norwegian dramatist ) 如果你怀疑自己，那么你的立足点确实不稳固了。 (挪威剧作家 易卜生)
Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
老师:为什么你每天早晨都迟到?
汤姆:每当我经过学校的拐角处, 就看见一个牌子上写着" 学校----慢行".
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
一、英语谜语
1．what man cannot live in a house?
什么人不能住在房子里?
Key ： snowman （雪人）
2．What never asks questions but gets a lot of answers?
什么东西永远不问问题但是却能得到很多答案?
Key ： dictionary （字典）
3．What question can you never answer "Yes" to?
什么问题你永远也不能回答" 是"
Key ： Are you dead?（你死了吗? ）
4、You have it．You read it．There're some pictures in it?
你拥有它，你可以阅读它，它有些图片在里面，它是什么?
Key ： book （书）
5、A mouse has a large pocket． What is it?
一种鼠有一个大袋子，它是什么?
Key ： a kangaroo（袋鼠）
6、It has a head ，but no neck．It has a body，but no warmth．NO feet，but can travel? 它有头，但没有脖子，有身体，但不温暖，没有脚，却能旅行。
Key ： a car（汽车）
二、英语小故事小幽默
狮子和老鼠 THE LION AND THE MOUSE
Lion was awakened from sleep by a Mouse running over his face. Rising up in anger, he caught him and was about to kill him, when the Mouse piteously entreated, saying： “If you would only spare my life, I would be sure to repay your kindness.” The Lion laughed and let him go.
It happened shortly after this that the Lion was caught by some hunters, who bound him by strong ropes to the ground. The Mouse, recognizing his roar, came up, and gnawed the rope with his teeth, and setting him free, exclaimed: “You ridiculed the idea of my ever being able to help you, not expecting to receive from me any repayment of your favor ； but now you know that it is
possible for even a Mouse to confer benefits on a Lion.”
一只老鼠从一只狮子面前跑过去，将它从梦中吵醒。狮子生气地跳起来，捉住老鼠，要弄死它。老鼠哀求说：“只要你肯饶恕我这条小生命，我将来一定会报答你的大恩。”狮子便笑着放了它。
后来狮子被几个猎人捉住，用粗绳捆绑倒在地上。老鼠听出是狮子的吼声，走来用牙齿咬断绳索，释放了他，并大声说：“你当时嘲笑我想帮你的忙，而且也不指望我有什么机会报答。但是你现在知道了，就算是小老鼠，也能向狮子效劳的。”
三、英语有趣的字词
Tit for tat：针锋相对
Tweedledum and tweedledee：半斤八两
hum and haw：表示犹豫或支吾的嗯嗯呃呃声
cling-clang ：叮当作响，铿锵声。
rat-tat, rat-a-rat, rat-tat -tat：（敲门的）砰砰声。
Flip-flop ：啪嗒啪嗒地响（动）
Zigzag ：弯弯曲曲
Hotch-potch ：大杂烩
Criss-cross ：纵横交错
Helter-skelter ：慌慌张张
Shilly-shally ：犹犹豫豫
Chit-chat ：拉呱
Dillydally ：磨磨蹭蹭
Tittle-tattle ：嚼舌头，搬弄是非
Higgledy-piggledy ：乱七八糟
Walkie-talkie ：步话机
Job-hop ：跳槽
apple 掌上明珠
green monster 嫉妒的人
ouch potato 懒虫
a cat nap 打盹儿
a social butterfly 善于交际的人
red tape 官僚主义
cat`s pow 被别人利用的人